TAB logic: Vote Labour

Labour have the Tab, we have our brains…

In a rather appalling article, even for the Tabs normal standard, they emerged whole heartedly supporting Labour. The question that we’re all asking is why? What was their reasoning for this conclusion?

From the article itself we’re given some hints as to why they don’t want you to vote for the other parties. Apparently the Green Party is “pointless”, UKIP “mental” and the SNP are “too Scottish”. That’s all you get, three parties wiped of the slate in one swipe.

Normally General Elections spark up great partisanship, but let’s put that aside for a second. The Green Party “pointless”? I’m not their biggest fan but they certainly have a clear and justified message. The same can be said for Ukip in many instances, their rhetoric with regard to the EU is very understandable. As someone who believes in the Union I can tell you that I am no fan of the SNP, but even they make clear, representative points for their electorate; the Scottish people.

The Lib Dems get the Tab treatment too of course. You can’t vote for them as they’re “perpetually unfortunate”. No mention of policy. To criticise a party for forming a government to stop this country getting into even more of a financial crisis than it was already in is nothing to deteste the Lib Dems for. The Lib Dems bit the bullet and made the sacrifices they needed to while Labour sulked and plotted to blame everyone else for the mess they left us in.

Yet here for the grand finale, the Conservatives. According to the Tab we’re only concerned with “big business”. I guess I’ll have to point out that of the most recent Tory PMs, Margaret Thatcher’s family ran a corner shop. John Major’s family is famous for having links in the circus industry, yet the Labourites turn their noses up. Ignorance is an awful thing, especially in politics. Hard work is rewarded by the Conservatives, if that develops into a big business, then congratulations. Success should be encouraged not sneared at. An essence of jealousy runs through the veins of every Labourite, not content with living happily to their means.

Apparently someone in their teens can’t possibly have an opinion on taxation. I mean it’s not like we’ve ever had so many young millionaires before? But I degress. They seem to think all Tories are from the upper classes (Don’t mention Tony Benn their heads will explode). The same old made up rhetoric there to deflect policy. Let’s look at who is telling us to vote Labour; Steve Coogan, Eddie Izzard, and Russell Brand. You’d have to be a comedian. Wait let me rephrase that, *multimillionaire comedians.

So let’s think about policies. Labour bang on about tax avoidance and point at the Tories. But on any factual check up people will notice that the current tax code was written by New Labour. 11,000 pages long, rumoured to cost over £30,000 a page, and somehow it’s the Tories fault? Pull the other one. Let’s look at what the Tories have done to ease avoidance; the Finance Act, the GAAR system and added resources to the HMRC. You don’t need Professor Tiley (Tax Expert) to point out that nothing more can be done by the Conservatives unless we suddenly find a magic pot of money to rectify the waste Labour spent on the rewrite.

But Labour supporters will point the finger somewhere else; they can’t quite accept how close to home the real problems lie. If Labour are the students’ party why fail to regulate the banks, why bring in fees in the first place and why not scrap the fees all together? Oh wait I know why; they’re professional hypocrites. The party of the privalleged who sit in their large suburban homes and pretend to help the ‘poor’ they helped to create to feed their own conscience.

Thus, the question remains why should you vote Labour? The answer is I don’t know. Maybe you have been sold a lie and ran with it. Maybe you’re in your urban elitist buble, reading this on a MacBook while complaining about inequality. The truth is, politics isn’t about romance; it’s about making things work.

To look at the current government and say that it hasn’t worked is like saying water flows uphill. We need a strong Conservative government to maintain the recovery and aid our growth. Don’t listen to the lies, vote Conservative.

— Alex Hyams

[Opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the official view of Reading University Conservative Association or any affiliated institution]

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